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   Home  > Articles

First Aid for Marriage

By Eric Bird of Family College for Marriage Resource

What is expected of me?

For some people, it will be nothing more than listening properly; for others, a little more. People may expect too much from us, yet in this sort of situation, we do not need to provide all the answers! The couple who are in trouble are going to have to find the answers themselves, with your gentle guidance. All we need to do is point them in the right direction.

They may want you to rescue them. Don't even be tempted to try. They must realise that only they can rescue themselves. No one else can.

Do not get trapped in a place where you are expected to "fix" their marriage. You can't, so don't let them think you can!

Things rarely change overnight, so prepare them for the long haul. Things didn't go wrong suddenly, so don't expect them to be put right in an instant.

Can I really help?

Try to avoid taking sides


In this article
- Can I really help?
- What is expected of me?
- Try to avoid taking sides
- Listening
- Where are they coming from, and where do they want to go?
- Different is not necessarily wrong
- Handling conflict
- Life events
- Intimacy
- What next?
- A special kind of help

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