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Old 2nd April 2013, 07:29 PM   #10
chosen
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 5,794
Re: How to see our married life through my wife's eyes

In my brothjers case she didnt seem to have the capacity to be faithful. He is the nicest guy you could meet(and everyone says that)and a brilliant dad as well. The kids stayed with him when she upped and left. He is now very happy with a lovely lady who he has been with for about 5 years, and she seems to have morals and integrity thank goodness.

I am glad that you are being firm, as carrying on with no boundaries or conditions would be suicide on your part.

You mention that she wouldnt do that if she was happy. Well, marriage has ups and downs, and it is when things are hard that we need to carry on being faithful no matter what, and remember our vows for better or for worse.

Raymond I am not denying that childhood abuse affect us, I have three adults in my family who were sexually abused by their father, but they dont go round shouting and screaming and breaking things or running around cheating on their partners. In fact they are lovely, kind, polite and caring people. One is training to be a counsellor so that she can become a childrens counsellor and help kids who are hurting.
I sometimes think that too much is blamed on our childhoods, so that we dont need to take responsibility for our poor choices and behaviour. As joyce Meyer says(a Christian teacher, herself seriously physically, emotionally and sexually abused most of her childhood) we cant help what is done to us but we can help how we deal with it and how we act.

You are another case in point Raymond, with your good marriage and nice kids.
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