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Old 5th April 2009, 10:43 PM   #8
clockwork orange
Registered User
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 73
Re: Redefine the marriage contract?

1aokgal, you talk so much sense. The second time around for me was about 10 years later, and we did have pre-marriage counselling. Many of the points you mention were covered. That is not to say we didn't have problems down the line, or that our marriage is trouble free now. But we did have a framework to build on, similar values in life and so on. So often its the small things that were never mentioned up front that become the deal-breakers, but with a good base to work from even deal-breakers can be resolved.

I also think that a good support base within our value system is so important. For us, it was the times we were not in fellowship in a good church that things went badly wrong. Now, it is the first place we look for support when we need it. We all need a confidential shoulder to cry on sometimes, even our menfolk. But how often are we too proud to admit it?

PS - not sure it was courage so much as self-preservation!!!
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