View Single Post
Old 18th April 2014, 11:42 PM   #13
Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 8
Re: 20 years Trapped

I don't think I could go on a retreat as it would cost money and I would have to explain to my husband why I wanted to go,, although it does sound ideal. You are perceptive.
During meditations today I have begun to see that part of my husbands control is my allowing him that control in order either for an easy life or to be better loved. It doesn't work as a strategy on either account so perhaps I ought to work on finding more strength in being me (whoever that is!)
Most of the time my husband is supportive but I am always conscious that I'm not working full time and don't want to give him cause to criticise. He has a short temper at home and so I never know what im dealing with when he comes in. Since we're both often in and around the house and the house is very public it's very difficult to find space to be.
Often I stand up for myself, but I know I put up with a lot more than most would in order to support what is a vocation and not a job. Also he does not mean to be like this. He does not need much from me -I need more affirmation and interaction than he has spare. Maybe I should just look elsewhere for this.
I will work on this.
Thank you so very much for taking time to reply. I can't tell you how much it means to be on the receiving end of care.
freddo is offline   Reply With Quote