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Old 3rd April 2014, 12:00 PM   #3
ronnoco
Registered User
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 391
Re: He has already left the marriage

Hello,

Sorry for the trouble you are going through. Your obviously reached your tipping point when you grabbed him out of pure frustration. I don't think he should have hit you and I don't think you should have hit him but what's done is done - I think him saying he wants a divorce because you hit him is to be taken with a pinch of salt, this is not the real reason.

Something is seriously wrong here and this is not going to be easy to fix as Chosen said.

I can think of 2 possibilities that might explain your husbands behavior.

1.) Your husband may feel trapped and frustrated with life. For some people, marriage is often like what I like to call the "Disney Land Experience" - it's all very exciting doing all the planning, buying the outfits, having a lovely wedding, party, honeymoon, etc but when that's gone - some people are left on this big low thinking "what now - where is my life going?" - I've seen this first hand. It's more common with women though in that they find someone, move in, get married, have kids or basically do things in a certain order then sometimes start thinking the above.

2.) It's very odd for a man to be in a sexless marriage and your husbands extremely cold behavior towards you is that of someone who attention could be somewhere else. I hope you husband isn't cheating on you, I really do but my gut instinct says he may well be. The way he is treating you is awful, like you say - like room mates who actually don't want to live together. He is trying to justify a divorce on a relatively minor thing and basically trying to turn things around to make it seem like you are the problem.

Have you noticed any difference in his behavior. Is he often on his phone or cagey about you seeing it? Is he often on the computer?, does he have female work colleagues, does he stay out late - are you seeing any red flags basically?
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