Thread: Baronness
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Old 16th December 2011, 02:09 AM   #287
Posts: n/a
Re: Husband doesn't want sex

Dear Baroness...

I don't think anyone here uses you for a punching bag. I don't think anyone insults you or puts you down. I do think most of us are women and we understand your feeling that things have not gone as you hoped. Aren't we raised on stories that Prince Charming comes along and life is happy ever after? Well, we KNOW that doesn't happen. We can fall in love with the heart, not the head, and find out that a man has misrepresented himself or put the best foot forward. What we got later, was far from that. So disallusionment sets in, as we realize we are older, have children,a home, and financial responsibilities that holds us. We feel we don't even know this person. So we cut the strings, and begin again. Divorce and separation ranks on the scale of stress elements at the highest point.

You have been married before and many of us went through broken marriages before we got lucky, or unlucky, as the case may prove to marry again. It is a proven fact that todays' women will sometime marry until they get it right!

What happens if they don't get it right? Statistics say the best chance for marriage is the first one. That statistic seems wrong to me! I think most of us will tell you that 1st marriage is the worst marriage because expectations are high and reality doesn't jive. Maturity, and a later marriage, shows we learn from the bad experience, We also have mellowed, so maybe we are a better partner. When People are in the 50's and 60's as Gabby is now, it is likely the last relationship. When others posted here, it is time others take to encourage you and give suggestions. That was meant to help and not to hurt. While you may not want to hear that, nor do I want to be rude, you should not be on the defensive. To say that someone throws something in your face is silly. If anything, there has been a lot of thought and kindness, from those who responded to your distress here and they, obviously, hoped to give you encouragement.

Sorry to disagree with you, but I don't think there is animosity or hostility towards you, not at all. It is true the threads are not a diary, but a forum, about the subject of the thread. That is why it was on the subject "a sexless marriage." Since you had not posted on a forum before, maybe that is the misunderstanding. Personally, I think the Moderator should close the thread. You could open a thread on the relationship in trouble. That would then make it possible for others to post to the situation. A sexless marriage and a relationship in trouble, is not the same. I think that is what is being said here, unless I am interpreting the posts incorrectly.
Most who post here have been on the forum for some years, so are familiar with the usual dialogues. We all want YOU to come out of being here and talking about things, better, and have a better grasp on how to find your way in future.
Is that how others think on this?

Last edited by 1aokgal; 16th December 2011 at 03:45 AM.