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Old 10th March 2009, 10:09 AM   #12
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Re: Advice needed on whether should let husband come on holiday with us.

Hi, its a while since I posted. My H moved out at the beginning of December and although there have been signs that he does still love me etc he is still seeing the OW. I found this out for definite this last weekend. His mother approached him about it and he said he wasn't proud of it. She had a go at him about his responsibilities to his daughters but it doesn't seem to get through to him. She said just get rid of this OW but he said it is harder than you think.

I am now resigned to the fact that he, once again, is not capable of making the decision so I will have to do it again. Next week I am going to have a talk with him about what is going on and ask him to remove all his possessions from our house. He has only partly moved out as at the moment he is hedging his bets. One question though please. At the moment, as he does not live too close, about a 35 minute drive and he lives in a one bedroomed cottage, when he sees our daughters he visits them in our house. I try to make myself scarce or he visits them when I am out in the evening. What do other people do? Should I insist he takes them somewhere else for the evening? He sometimes maybe just pops in for 1/2 hour on his way home from work. In the future though this could get awkward. I am trying to do the no contact thing at the moment which is difficult if he just calls in. Last night he was supposed to come while I was out at badminton but after his mother had had a go at him yesterday he said it would just upset him if he came! Poor lamb!

Next week I will sit him down and ask him if a relationship with OW is what he truly wants as if it is, just pack everything and get on with it, stop messing me about telling me he loves me one week then nothing the next.
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