Quote:
Originally Posted by LibraLady
Again, just like I see on so many of these posts. It seems quite clear that while we women are always concerned about how many years we have put into our marriages, the offending men could care less. Why is that? Why are you the only one concerned about letting go of 29 years and he isnt? really?
Why do you feeli like you should stay and endure this just because you haver 'ALL OF THESE YEARS" together? I dont get it. I pray you found solace with yourself and let him go.
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It's not just always the women who're concerned about how many years have gone into the marriage. Men do too.
I also don't think it's so much to do with feeling that so many have gone into the relationship as much as is it about commitment and a belief systems that marriage has an element of finality. Just to listen the vows people make - for better or worse, until death do us part....The architects of marriage designed it with those attributes as fundamental. That marriage is a social investment that pays off by a lifetime commitment to companionship.So when someone is betrayed, it's basically the obliteration of that fundamental belief and a realization that the return on investment(ROI) in years they put in will never pay off. It's the same way we would say "Over the last 10 years, I put so much money in this deal, I can't believe there's only little money left...Should I cut my losses, jump ship and get out of the investment deal now or should I hang in there
since I've already invested so much time in it."
That said, I don't think people eventually just end up staying owing to the years they already invested in the marriage. When they reach their tipping point, they cut the umbilical code....