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Old 21st March 2013, 04:38 AM   #17
Forever
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 1,408
Re: I feel betrayed!

So my understanding is that you wish to end the marriage and then afterwards go to Canada w/o her so that she cannot then refuse to work and begin a ten years sponge off of the government once you get there? How does the Law in India apply to ending an arranged marriage...when is it permissable...how would you do that and not jeopardize your families assets? What grounds would you use for ending the marriage...fraud?...because of not disclosing her health issues?


This certainly started of very poorly...you agreeing to marry a woman w/o knowing her, her intentions or health issues... issues which make it very difficult to perform as a wife and mother...so I assume you thought you were marrying a "normal" woman who could keep up with your preferred life style?

I think it is ashamed that you consumated the marriage before knowing a lot more about her...that is what we use "courting" or "dating" for here in the States...so there will be fewer surprizes before making such a big committment. That said however, our divorce rate is so high that even knowing a person very well is no guarantee of happiness together either...divorce is granted for any reason or even no reason at all. So compatability, love, and personal desire seems to be weighted as a small factor in arranged marriages there, yet I am certain the divorce rate is nothing like it is here regardless...keeping your vow/promise seems to be weighted heaviest there.

Are you still living next door to your wife...giving her the "comfort of privacy"? If so, then how can that really be of help for either of you to get to know each other...forming an emotional bond cannot happen without spending a lot of time talking honestly to each other.

As far as sex goes...that is probably a bad thing to do right now anyway if you are serious about ending the marriage...she could get pregnant! But I wonder if there had been an ample supply of sex, would you still be wanting out of the marriage? Would you be so detached from each other so as not to even try to work out the health issues?

I am not sure what you want...are you wanting one of us to tell you that you are justified to end the marriage based on all you have told us?

That is a difficult thing to do...on the one hand, you would not buy a horse without the owner disclosing particulars and any medical issues it had...On the other hand, she is not a horse...

Here in the USA, we do not marry unless we are "in love" with a person and know quite a bit about them first. It seems as if that is not important to do in India...so the emotions do not count as far as being compatible enough for love to grow. That means you have to decide what to do based on the customs and factors that DO COUNT there for keeping or else ending a marriage. I do not know what they are there...only you do, so based on what you know of the laws...and based on what you feel about your wife, her condition, and her intentions, do what you will.

Last edited by Forever; 21st March 2013 at 05:02 AM.
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