[Engineer]

No one so far seems to 'get' how you feel. I don't think you are abnormal or a fruit cake etc etc. I found this site because I put a search in for exactly what you have described. I did this because I am a man who would like my partner to do exactly the same as you wish your husband to do - and I wanted to know if some women felt the same too.

I would describe myself as sexually kinky, and yet if I love a women, I will love her 100%. This does not mean we would have to be sexually exclusive to each other. I am thinking you are the same - you do love your husband?

A lot of people cannot separate love from sex. Some of us can I believe. I think that is what you are able to do. Don't ask me why we should desire the one dearest to us to sleep with someone else, that is a question I have asked myself a thousand times and I cannot make sense of it. It simply is as it is. I don't believe any amount of counselling would change that. And like you, I believe myself to be a normal and very moral person in most conventional ways. In fact, I don't even believe this need to be immoral - because it is not devious or cheating behaviour - you have been completely up front.

For myself I think maybe the reason I have not found the right lady I can settle down with is because I need her to have the same desires as myself, and the chances of coming across someone like that in the everyday way of things is very slight. That's why I am investigating this and found your thread, for my own understanding.

One thing I will agree with other people on here with is that you can't make people do what they don't want to. If your husband doesn't like the idea, don't push him - it could lead to the end of your marriage. That said, I think I do understand, good luck!