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Old 23rd December 2010, 07:04 PM   #2
Forever
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 1,408
Re: I don't want to get a divorce

Leilag,

No, please do not de-friend him on Facebook. That will look to him like what he is believing about you may be true. If anything, use facebook as a tool to tell him that you understand how he must be feeling, and that you will wait for him to be ready to talk. He is absolutely ticked off at you, but you need to give him time to cool without pushing him for conversation.

When you get the opportunity, that is, after he has initiated conversation, would you be willing to tell him that you will be willing to give up your career entirely? That may be the only thing that would give him a sense of relief given your life styles, and given the working enviroment that you have.

If not, then he may elect to continue to believe the worst, and there is nothing you can do to prove to him otherwise. Your flatmate did the ultimate damage, but your working enviroment and living arrangements apart from him left room for so many things to go on in his head. He has a standard for how a wife should act. You are not helping him trust you and be at peace with you when you choose to live contrary to what he believes is proper for a woman/wife.

If he, NOT YOU, files for divorce, then you will have to accept that he has made up his mind. He feels disgraced and this is his solution.

Hope that helps.

Last edited by Forever; 23rd December 2010 at 08:59 PM.
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