Quote:
Originally Posted by chosen
That maybe because you are going to write to her, my advise, get that written and sent off today. No point at all in delaying it. Did you look into maybe working part time to get you out of the house?
I am the sort of person who makes a decision and does it. I dont procrastinate and cant understand why people do. I appreciate that you are worried at what she may say, but this needs to be done and got over with I think.
My daughter went on a holiday on her own to Southern ireland 3 weeks ago, for 10 days. She loved the peace and quiet, did a lot of thinking while there, decided that she wanted to live somewhere quieter and more in the country, did some on line searching, found an annexe of a large farm house near a nice village to rent 30 mins drive from her job, and is moving there in 10 days!!! She is like me, makes her mind up and gets on with it. She said that if she wants her life to change the only one who can do it is her, its not dependant on anyone else. She realises that she cant sit around waiting for something to happen or for a man to come and make it all ok. She is divorced BTW.
Maybe make some decisions yourself? Assuming that she doesnt come back, what do you want to happen in the next year? Move house?Move away? Somewhere you actually like? Get a part time job? Find some voluntary work? Take up a hobby? Plan a holiday? Make some plans and make a move towards doing it. Do some research and look into the things you want to do.
The thing is if you dont, you will still be in the same place in another year. I know so many people who arent happy with their lives, but wont make any changes or do anything about it.
I cant wait to move, probably to worcestershire or Warwickshire or maybe Gloucestershire, but with my daughter and her partner living with us temporarily we are stuck till they leave. As soon as they go with their stuff(tons of it)the house will go on the market.
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I love this post. This is exactly how I feel now. Detached and over it. Making a plan for myself and S10. I'm the only one responsible for my happiness, nobody else.
I know my M is dead. It's just the paperwork now. So be it. As I've said time and time again it will not be the defining point in my life.
My new home is in an area where I know I will be happy. Friends, a social life. Fun stuff but also practical. It all makes sense to me now.
Ex? Still flaying. But that's only a concern to me where S10 is affected.
Someone has to man up and be the rock for him and that person is me.
Ralf. I'm not you so if this email is the final thing that puts an end to it for you then get on with writing it. But if there is no response or the response is in the negative then that's it mate. Put it to bed and move on. It's difficult not to put expectations on these things. God knows I did for a long time but it only sets you up for a knock down. Be prepared for that.
Peace my friend.