View Single Post
Old 7th April 2014, 10:16 PM   #2
Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 391
Re: Newly Married & want a Divorce Help Please!!

Hi Lisa,

Let's start by taking a step back. Your ex cheated on you. That's a terrible thing to do. He broke your heart, he broke your trust and he destroyed the family unit you had for his own needs. I think the problem you might have is you picture everything eventually being alright again with your ex, but in reality, it probably wouldn't. We often picture a fairy tale scenario of getting back together but this isn't real life.

A friend of mine once gave me a really good analogy. When someone cheats, imagine and elastic band that has been snapped. Sure, it can be put together by tying a knot in it but it's never the same as what it was before. It's not as strong and It's not how it was intended to be. Doubt will always be in your mind. Will you ever truly trust him again? Will your be tormented every time he is late home from work, gets a few text messages or goes out on a lads night? If you did get back together and 2 years down the line he cheated on you, how would you feel?

You have married someone and he sounds like a really great person who many women would be delighted to have. The qualities you want in a person are integrity, morals, character and family values. He has these and he must have had that special something for you to fall for him in the first place. I agree that you need to have that spark but I think it's just these thoughts of your ex that are probably confusing you and actually preventing the chemistry and emotionally connection you need with your husband developing.

I think if you can get past them, you could be happy and get what you need from your husband. I certainly thing you owe it to yourself, your husband and your daughter to give it a really good try. Get some good counselling and really try hard to make it work.

All the best.

Last edited by ronnoco; 8th April 2014 at 08:34 AM.
ronnoco is offline   Reply With Quote