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Old 6th October 2004, 03:48 AM   #18
SelaW
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Re: masturbation, porn and marriage

I've been married for 16 years and I can count on one hand the number of times my husband and I have had sex in all those years. We didn't even have sex on our wedding night! He has always suffered from something called "Inhibited Ejaculation" so even when we have had sex he was never able to have an orgasm. He can however achieve orgasm by masturbating alone and watching porn on the computer which he does almost every night. We have been to 3 different marriage counsellors and he has been to 4 different sex therapists but no one has been able to help. One doctor told us this problem can be caused by the man masturbating to porn from a young age and conditioning his body and mind to only get aroused by hardcore porn and the tight grip of his own hand. He asked me if, when we did have intercourse, if my husband ever complained that his penis felt numb. I almost fell off the chair because he complained about the fact that he couldn't feel anything everytime we had sex. The doctor explained that a vagina can never match the tight grip and super vigorous up and down action a man uses while masturbating so of course he doesn't get the hard stimulation with me that he does when he masturbates. Plus men get hooked on the fantasy of being able to have a different women and different types of sexual activity just by clicking the mouse and downloading a new porn movie or going to different porn sites on the internet.

He is a good man and a wonderful husband so I have learned to accept our sexless marriage. My advice to women who's husbands are masturbating to porn is to do something before it is too late. If the number of times a week or month that you have sex has been dwindling or if he is having problems ejaculating or keeping his erection, it could be caused by the porn.
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