Thread: Need to move on
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Old 14th February 2017, 08:11 PM   #4
Starmate
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Re: Need to move on

Hi Chosen & Raymond & everyone else,

Thank you for your replies, means a lot. Chosen, I had already started doing new things before I left the marriage, hub didn't like that. Years and years I've sat at home depressed, bringing up my daughter and so wishing things could change whilst he was out drinking and partying with work & friends - but yet he still thinks he's in a position to complain when I went out twice in a year with work! I was accused of all sorts. I fought my corner but I still live in disbelief at his nerve. Went to my Christmas night out, he insisted on picking me up, I introduced him to a girl I work with he said she was a lesbian and wouldn't talk to me all the way home in the car. Just a small example of what I've endured over years.
Raymond, you have a good memory! Yes, porn was an issue but more so chat rooms and divulging info about our marriage/sex life to strangers - that was 2004 and I felt so hurt. I don't know if this continued, possibly. Drinking and partying took over for him and complete selfishness that he still cannot see. I gave up, it was too much effort to have to put back the pieces time and time again with no effort or input from him - he can't see that either. He's telling people we split up over money problems, not the real story of course coz I don't think he has the common sense to even work that out yet. We had a massive bad patch in 2011 (well not for him coz he looked after himself), I told him he was making me hate him but he never ever took anything I said seriously - and that's what's happened bit by bit. I eventually withdrew completely, he still couldn't work it out. Got a job, got out more, detached myself completely over the last couple of years - and here I am.

I've done my grieving already, every time he hurt me a piece of the marriage fell away. The only grief I have is for the marriage I had committed to for life, feel like a failure but I really really tried. I'm feeling ok most days, getting stronger.

Hope everyone is well & I'm here if you want to comment or reply.

Thanks guys.



Star x
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