[ronnoco]

Hey Car111,

Sorry to hear you are going through a tough time.

Communication is the most important thing. It's vital for a successful marriage so don't worry about telling your husband what you want. Don't worry you may "rock the boat" - this will do more harm than good.

Do you know what your husbands love language is? Google it and you will find the 5. You can even take on online test if you're not sure. Yours sounds very much like "physical touch"

If you both discover each others love language, you can start giving each other more of what you both like. This will be a good thing.

Having 3 young children is hard...I know as I have 3 myself. The days roll into one and it takes it's toll on you. You need to make quality time for you and your husband. Perhaps at least once a fortnight you could ask a family member or friend to baby sit and do something together. Why not sit down and write a list of all the things you would like to do and all the things your husband would like to do and start making them happen.

Perhaps you could arrange a weekend away if money permits. Even if just staying at a cheap hotel. A change of scenery will do wonders, perhaps catch a show, romantic dinner, etc.

Re-kindle the romance, have that quality time together. Have a cuddle on the sofa and watch a film, share a bottle of wine, etc - i'm sure you get the picture.

You're doing all the right things. It must be very difficult as you started that grieving process and actually, it sounds like you were doing really well and now you've had an unexpected turn around. You've probably got your guard up high which is understandable.

Try these suggestions but most importantly, keep talking to each other.

All the best!