1aokgal

Dear Edgy...

I am very sorry to see you in such distress.

We are very different people, and see things from a different viewpoint. If I loved this man I would call him and tell him I am quite miserable. I would tell him I was wrong about many things and I had regret things are bad between us. Perhaps I would say it is hard to see life ahead without him.

When one makes such a call, we risk the other person being cool. It is better to take a risk before it is too late! Some humility is needed in how you approach your husband. That is how a woman who loves a man will put herself out there to save that marriage. If you were my daughter I would say, "Have a good cry first so you keep composed when you talk to him." Get rid of the accusations, so you don't launch into a discussion/blame session with him on the phone! Get over the blame game. You DO need to change YOU, so you have a good life with your husband. It is how you plan to be a good mother, as you want in your future. Be the one with humility to take things on you. Be a good wife first. Wish him a Happy Easter with his family, if it kills you to say it! Tell him you want to see him soon.

Think about the life you had together and go try to salvage your marriage. It isn't about sex in strange places. It is about reading a poem together or to walk together through a beautiful flower garden. That is passion! Sexuality begins in your mind. Passion is how you can't stand to breathe without him in your life. I feel that emotion for my husband through every day we share these years. That is the real passion one feels for the one we love. You must work together, perhaps with a counselor, to take any ugliness out of this marriage and replace it with kindness, respect and love that will last your lifetime. It is true youth is wasted on the young! What I would give to relive your time of life with my husband!

Yes, you have work to do together with a counselor to get through some of these misunderstandings. Never say things you will regret and remember, he chose you for the special person you are. Be special for him. Go sign up for Salsa classes with your man, that is passion! You can be RIGHT, or you can be loved and loving. Which do you choose?
It takes work to make a good marriage. It doesn't just happen.
It is worth all the effort you put forth. What do you owe him? Everything! God bless.