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chosen · 1st October 2010, 09:45 PM

I agree with Raymond
In marriage I do feel that we need to accept the person as they are, and Thank God for their good qualities. Also in marriage we can compliment each other, and have different strengths and weaknesses. He may not be able to do things that you do, but he can do others, and as you say has a good heart. I am sure that many women would be glad to have a husband with a good heart.

My husband is very intelligent in his field, has a Phd, is a qualified chemical engineer, a chartered accountant, writes research papers which get published and does detailed stastitical analysis in health care, but he frequently forgets every day things such as how old he is(lol) can never remember when anyones birthday is (including his own)can never remember how old his sons are, forgets to comb his hair,is often in a world of his own, and the list goes on, BUT he is a good, lovely, kind and godly man and I usually just smile about it and, accept him as he is. I am not so intelligent in those areas (and usually dont understand what he is talking about)but I have the day to day common sense and organisation that are needed to run a house and a family, so we are all different.

I am not sure what you mean about what the Bible says about this. About what? One person not being as intelligent as another? I think that God would say that all of his children are equal in His eyes and loved and important, and that we all have our strengths and weaknesses and He accepts us as we are.

Like you, I am in a second marriage, I am 53 and have been married for 5 years now.
Unless you want to carry on being unhappy, angry and resentful(which will make you ill, yes), may I suggest that you ask God for forgiveness and also ask Him to help you to love your husband as he is,and to accept him as God does.Whenever you get an angry or resentful thought, thank God for the goodness in your husband, and think of the reasons that you married him again.Dont dwell on the negatives, but the positives.

My husbands first wife spent 23 years trying to change him and to make him into her 'perfect' man. She then met what she thought was her 'perfect' man and had an affair and divorced her then husband. Well, this three times divorced non Christian man, wasnt of course perfect and they broke up.The grass is always greener and instead of her being grateful for the 95% she did have she complained about the 5% that she thought she didnt. In doing so she rejected a great man,and a very caring husband and dad.(but I win cos I got him!)

Dont allow this anger and resentment to eat you up any longer.

1st October 2010, 09:45 PM	#3
chosen Registered User Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 5,794	Re: marriage unequal in intelligence I agree with Raymond In marriage I do feel that we need to accept the person as they are, and Thank God for their good qualities. Also in marriage we can compliment each other, and have different strengths and weaknesses. He may not be able to do things that you do, but he can do others, and as you say has a good heart. I am sure that many women would be glad to have a husband with a good heart. My husband is very intelligent in his field, has a Phd, is a qualified chemical engineer, a chartered accountant, writes research papers which get published and does detailed stastitical analysis in health care, but he frequently forgets every day things such as how old he is(lol) can never remember when anyones birthday is (including his own)can never remember how old his sons are, forgets to comb his hair,is often in a world of his own, and the list goes on, BUT he is a good, lovely, kind and godly man and I usually just smile about it and, accept him as he is. I am not so intelligent in those areas (and usually dont understand what he is talking about)but I have the day to day common sense and organisation that are needed to run a house and a family, so we are all different. I am not sure what you mean about what the Bible says about this. About what? One person not being as intelligent as another? I think that God would say that all of his children are equal in His eyes and loved and important, and that we all have our strengths and weaknesses and He accepts us as we are. Like you, I am in a second marriage, I am 53 and have been married for 5 years now. Unless you want to carry on being unhappy, angry and resentful(which will make you ill, yes), may I suggest that you ask God for forgiveness and also ask Him to help you to love your husband as he is,and to accept him as God does.Whenever you get an angry or resentful thought, thank God for the goodness in your husband, and think of the reasons that you married him again.Dont dwell on the negatives, but the positives. My husbands first wife spent 23 years trying to change him and to make him into her 'perfect' man. She then met what she thought was her 'perfect' man and had an affair and divorced her then husband. Well, this three times divorced non Christian man, wasnt of course perfect and they broke up.The grass is always greener and instead of her being grateful for the 95% she did have she complained about the 5% that she thought she didnt. In doing so she rejected a great man,and a very caring husband and dad.(but I win cos I got him!) Dont allow this anger and resentment to eat you up any longer.