[chosen]

MY thought after reading this is that some people will never be happy no matter what you do. We cant go though life expecting to be treated like a princess. Thats not real life, nor possible, nor even good for us. She is a wife and mother to two young children, but she is acting very selfishly and in a very immature way. She is actually acting like a spolit brat, screaming and shouting and throwing her toys(literally).To some extent you are enabling her behaviour, and excusing it. Her behaviour is actually abusive, and the children will be damaged by it.

My husband was often punished with a belt, and he is the nicest, most easy going, easy to please man ever.

You seem to be blaming her affairs on the way you acted, I doubt that was the case from what you say. An affair is a decision. Those who cheat will aways blame the other person. Its human nature. She has had at least 2 already, and the liklihood is that she wont stop there. She appears to only want you when she has no one else, for security I suppose. You need to ask yourself if that is what you want. Do you want to be the fall back guy for when her affairs end? Do you want to live with a woman who lies, cheats and decieves? How can you trust her?