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Old 26th June 2013, 01:32 PM   #23
chosen
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 5,794
Re: child produced from affair with married man

In your position I would not stay with such a man. However, if I did I would set clear conditions for this to carry on.
They would be thing like this.
He came back to you and lived with you. He told her that he was with you and that he wasn't going to leave you.
He was going to provide financially for the baby and come to an arrangement about visitation, AFTER there had been a paternity test.
He would spend no time alone with her in her home.
If he had visitation rights, then you would both go and collect the child an see him or her together at YOUR home.
He must tell her that he will never be with her as her partner.
Also there must be strict boundaries in place for future behaviour with other women.

I would not want this man to be the father of my children. I would not want this man to be my husband. He has no morals, no integrity and he lies cheats and deceives. I think he is stringing you along and telling you lies to be honest. He thinks things will change when the baby is here, they wont. She will carry on controlling and manipulating the situation making threats to to keep him around ie that she will take the child and go abroad etc, and that will last till the child is an adult.

I think you need to be strong and stop allowing this man to get away with his appalling behaviour.
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