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Old 21st February 2005, 08:00 PM   #3
Made My Bed
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Re: I don't love my wife and never have...

17 years ago I married a woman I didn't love. We were good friends and got along great but there was no love on my part. After 15 years on the dating scene I hadn't fallen in love with anyone so I chose to go with someone I was at least comfortable with. The sex was terrible and we refrained from sex for long periods at a time. Now, in my late 40's I see myself getting old and very much regret having never been in love with anyone. I feel I am more capable of love now than I was in my teens. 20. or 30's. Why I suddenly started to crave the feeling of being truly in love at this late date I'll never know. I guess the thought of a life lived without love is just too much to bear.

I have children too, they are still quite young and I feel a great responsibility to be there for them. So for me, despite feeling very depressed about all this, there are few if any choices. Everyone has to make a decision, especially with children involved, but I'd hate to see anyone else end up in my shoes.
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