Thread: Broke boyfriend
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Old 9th April 2015, 04:33 PM   #27
1aokgal
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Re: Broke boyfriend

Dear Lindentree..

Minnesota? Wow, that is cold and rural. Were you raised on a farm? How did you go from there to Chicago? I know there are still many Mennonites in that area and large family owned farms. I have seen films of that area, but never there. I do Geneology online, and Minnesota is interesting for history of immigrants.

I am one who loves rural, and enjoy a drive in the country (with the dog), and often take pics to use in oil painting. Your dog doing OK? I am sure to avoid crowds and hectic city places. Big shopping malls are wasted on me. We have a botanical garden in the area with pleasant pathways and that outing sure brightens my day. I read your story and I feel your sadness at how someone you think you know, can become cold and a stranger. Personally, I think men shut down pretty harsh...more than women. When it gets to the point you realized all is lost, then comes time you need to save yourself and salvage what you can to begin again. It is not easy to build a new life, or gain skills for survival. When one is a pair, and then you need to survive alone, it can be overwhelming.

I see many churches now have meetings for separated, divorced, and that can be very helpful and supportive. Our city has an activity section of the newspaper with all kinds of support groups. That helped me for a time deal with the extreme anxiety and grief I felt when a marriage was over. There is the need to survive financially, and all the physical things that come with that stress. I hope you have kind people and family to give you support as this goes along. One day it just gets better.

Since my husband is away all the time, I also have to be comfortable in my own space. I love the painting lessons on U-tube and creating something beautiful in the use of my time. I think I have a bit to share about life, so post here at times.
The problem you have you posted about is clearly Sciatica, and pain radiates down one leg from the back. That is most likely a herniated disk. This disk problem can result from some physical strain, picking up something heavy, or even weak abdominals, sitting too much, needing more strength exercises. There are some simple stretch exercises that help (online) this, but Sciatica can run from excruciating pain, to one becoming immobile. The swelling involved in an injury takes months to heal. Yes, I know that problem well, as do millions who lose work time because of "bad back" discomfort.

Do you and your husband talk about your situation or does he just blow you off?
Today, I paint, Tomorrow, I have to do the blasted taxes, which takes me several days to do complicated biz return and such. I feel like condemned! I can't procrastinate any longer on the task. On your return..I would file separately, and not bend to his needs or desires. Sounds like he just wants to pull your strings, so he benefits. Who cares?

Last edited by 1aokgal; 9th April 2015 at 05:23 PM.
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