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Old 28th December 2007, 11:27 PM   #391
Raymond
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Re: masturbation, porn and marriage

I agree that porn can turn the body on, but the cost is enormous in the effect on one's character, marriage and other relationships. It's about sex without relationship, becoming an animal eventually.

The most satisfying sex is found in relationship and sharing, not in mental adultery. Sex is too important to play with in that respect. It is like lighting a fire in the middle of the room instead of in the fireplace (marriage) and one gets burnt along with those you love. Not many can take this but it is still true.

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Old 3rd February 2008, 01:04 AM   #392
super_rn
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Re: masturbation, porn and marriage

Quote:
Originally Posted by chrissi View Post
Hi, I am 6 months pregnant and my husband wont go near me in bed as he says he is scared if harming the baby. I think its more to do with me being fat at the moment. then i find hes been looking at teen porn on the internet. when i asked him about he denied it all to start with and said i am being paranoid, even thogh the evidence was there in front of him! he then admitted it and said all men look at it. also 2 weeks before this he went out to the pub, when he wasnt home by 2am i called him to check he was ok and his phone was switched off. i called his friend who said he'd left the pub alone at 11pm. he sent me a text message at 6am to say he was on his way.
he told me he'd been on his way home and seen a friend and gone to his house and fell asleep and his battery on phone was flat, but he'd managed to call a cab with it!
am i right to still feel so angry with him still? my heads all over the place at the moment, and i just dont trust him anymore.
Chrissi, will all due respect-your husband is lying to you. His actions are of a single man-not a married man. NO married man falls asleep at a friend's and his phone just happens to die. He is lying to you and I think you know it. You are in denial! This man is fooling around. How convenient he called you in the morning. Wake up!! He is conning and lying. Get out now
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Old 14th February 2008, 12:09 PM   #393
ABJones
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Post Re: masturbation, porn and marriage

I am having serious problems with my husband and the same issue. My husband looks at porn even after I told him it hurts me, he has had cyber sex and been apart of online sex groups that cost money, he also continues to go to strip clubs with his single brother and single friends. All of this is completely UNACCEPTABLE in my opinion! I know that I am not overreacting. We have been married a little over a year, and on our anniversary I made a nice candle lit dinner and gave him a lovely gift. He didn't get me anything! Yet, he can go to a strip club and blow a hundred dollars. I feel that looking at other naked women is going against the institution of marriage. I fell inadequate and sexually turned off towards him. Having sex with him actually makes me feel dirty now. I guess I don't have any advice for you except to assure you other women feel this way and it is not right to do such things once you have gone to the alter. If you want to do those things, you best stay single, in my opinion. I feel it is completely ridiculous that this stupid thing my husband can't stop doing is causing an end to our marriage. I have been contemplating moving out.
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Old 14th February 2008, 02:13 PM   #394
Raymond
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Re: masturbation, porn and marriage

Totally understandable.

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Old 25th February 2008, 10:41 AM   #395
Ericz
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Red face Re: masturbation, porn and marriage

I am married, 34 years old, with a wife who I love very much, yet feel exactly as your husband does. My wife enjoys masturbating to porn when we are together, but can hardly stand it to catch me in the act. She feels I do it secretly while I feel it is something known to be a solo (and private) act. I don't mean to leave her out, and definitely wouldn't stop her from joining in, but at the same time still see it as something that is heathy, relaxing, and as hard as it may be to swallow (pun intended), sometimes better done in private.
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Old 25th February 2008, 03:16 PM   #396
Alice Alice
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Re: masturbation, porn and marriage

Masturbation is not the answer unless your in jail or something but even then you might feel worse to the point of suicide..being you feel lonely after the act.

anyone can over come this bad habit slowly and once in awhile slip but no one is perfect.

lets look at it for what it is ...""having sex with someone else" , it will only put a wedge between the 2 of you

this is how the wedge starts... you masturbate... you have a fantasy... on another day you make love to your partner ...your mind wanders your expectation isn't met... you make LOUSY love... this puts a wedge in the relationship and if your partner finds out or already knows your masturbation has become part of your life style and you are a lousy lover this wedge gets bigger.

trust me i used to masturbate when i was a virgin it always made me feel gross and i tried to make it a good thing i was told by my counselor at school not to have sex but masturbate instead

and now i have a man who masturbates all i have is a sexless marriage due to his habit
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Old 25th February 2008, 07:16 PM   #397
Raymond
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Re: masturbation, porn and marriage

You speak sense Alice.

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Old 6th December 2019, 09:42 AM   #398
Pop Alexandra
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Re: masturbation, porn and marriage

It does seem like a bad experience, but masturbation is also a spectrum... it's not inherently wrong, but it could quickly degenerate.
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