Site Areas
Wedding Centre
Health Club
Marriage Clinic
Chapel
University
Citizen's Centre
Coffee Shop
Admin Centre

Contents
Articles
Books
CDs / Videos
Tips
Services

Resources
Forums
Membership
Contact Us
Site map
Link to Us

Search

Take the Couple Check-up!

Marriage Week UK

Marriage first aid

Online support for your marriage

Free Tell A Friend from Bravenet


Home > Forums
2-in-2-1 Discussion Forums  

Go Back   2-in-2-1 Discussion Forums > Advice > Marriage Help

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 18th October 2007, 07:37 AM   #1
jude09
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Unhappy Financial worries before marriage

I am in a relationship with a girl from the last 3 and a half years. We love each other to bits. We are so compatible that we hardly ever fight. Even if we do we talk it out and resolve it.

She comes from a poor family, has 3 siblings. Her dad has a low paying job back in their town. Being the eldest child, she came to the big city to work and support her family (right after completing high school, giving up her graduation).

I come from a well-to-do family with our own house, and fairly wealthy. We have always lived a comfortable life thanks to my fathers great paying job over the years. He is now retired.

Though i have done graduation with a diploma, i opted to take a more "artistic" line of work. Hence I am earning very less compared to what i could have been earning now with my credentials. I only make enough to get me thru the month, pay my bills.

We have decided to get married, and our parents have okayed it. Though i am certain my parents are not completely pleased, because of her family background, her lack of higher studies, how she would fit in our social circle, her job (she works at a bar/restaurant). And have voiced their opinion to me.

I am worried about the situation after marriage. Besides supporting the 2 of us, we have to save money to support her family, her brothers' education. Also as a couple we would need to save money and plan for the future, car, house, kids etc. I do not want to ask money from my father, as it wont be right.

She is a wonderful girl, with a big heart, who has sacrificed so much to do so much for her family. I could never be half the person she is.

Our engagement is planned for next month, and marriage next year. I am a practical person, and not so blinded by love that i dont see the possible future financial load. It is eating me up from inside, and I really want advice from you all.

Thanks
  Reply With Quote
Old 21st October 2007, 02:54 PM   #2
Kate
Moderator
 
Join Date: Feb 2000
Posts: 1,115
Re: Financial worries before marriage

Dear Jude

You are being very wise and thoughtful to consider how you can provide for you wife. Financial pressures can cause difficulties in marriage but many people avoid the issue.

I would suggest that you consider some good marriage preparation soon. Programmes like Prepare and FOCCUS are excellent for couples who come from differing backgrounds as they provide the opportunity to talk through together how you are going to manage your life together. I think that is the most important thing - to face these challenges together, to talk them through, and find ways to solve them that you are both happy about.

There are other possibilities for marriage preparation including Engaged Encounter. These programmes are all available in USA which I guess is where you are from
Best wishes

Kate
Kate is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 07:59 PM.


Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.


Top

Copyright ©1999-2024 2-in-2-1 Limited. All rights reserved. Disclaimer