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Old 3rd March 2010, 12:57 AM   #1
musicworld
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Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

Hi

I decided to add this post to find out where I stand in the law of marriage, the story goes... I was made redundant some time ago due to the crisis and have been unemployed ever since (six months) I have seeked to find work in all areas but due to living on a tourist island (Tenerife) I've been extremely limited in finding a full time position. My wife works full time as a sales rep and receives a wealthy income each month due to high sales, so her supporting the both of us since my redundancy has not would you say crippled her account in any way.

However that is not the point, I being the man understand I'm obligated in a marriage to provide and support for my wife’s needs, but this has just not been possible due to where we live, and its come to the point where she can't bear the fact of me not working any more and bringing in an income.

I admit I completely agree with her attitude and as a result I'm feeling ashamed and terribly embarrassed about the whole thing that is why I've strongly suggested that we both move back to the UK where there is a greater opportunity for me to work, but she has rejected this offer due to her high position of work and saying that she’s happy where she is, but at the same time has threatened to kick me out and is considering divorce.

We’ve been married five years, to encapsulate our relationship would be to say where compatible, faithful, honest, and caring for each other, I myself don’t drink smoke or do drugs and there is no signs of physical abuse towards each other. but i being a christian just can't except the fact that she wants a divorce, So considering we are man & wife and the house is in her name could she stand any grounds in a court of law as apposed to having me evicted even though we are married?
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Old 3rd March 2010, 01:51 PM   #2
Raymond
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Re: Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

What a shallow reason for a divorce musicworld. Marriage is much more important than a temporary financial problem. Where’s the commitment? Are you telling the whole story? This seems very hardnosed, especially as you are willing to work. Has her head been turned by money or is there someone else?

Unless there has been a pre-nuptial agreement you should get a share of the house etc. You should contact a legal expert on this matter though.

In these days the husband cannot always be the main provider even though he is trying his best. However, willingness is tantamount to doing in my book and should be recognised as such by your wife. It sounds as if you are a christian and she is not? If that is the case you can let her leave according to scripture. If it comes to it you are better fighting the case legally in this instance and I wouldn't leave the house that easily. This sounds like it could get nasty but she has brought it on herself really.

Are you joint owners of the house or is it in her name? Even if it is in her name the courts do look favourable on the other spouse so you are unlikely to be kicked out with nothing.

The saddest part is the breakup of the marriage for a petty reason.

Raymond
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Old 4th March 2010, 12:38 AM   #3
musicworld
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Re: Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

Hi Ray, thanks! for your response.


Has her head been turned by money or is there someone else?

I have approached this question and it's been denied, but I'm still not sure?

It sounds as if you are a christian and she is not?

Correct, she has confessed to me that shes not a christian.

If that is the case you can let her leave according to scripture

Please could you direct me to the verse Ray, I'm not familiar with this scripture.

Last edited by musicworld; 4th March 2010 at 12:46 AM.
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Old 4th March 2010, 09:23 AM   #4
Raymond
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Re: Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

1 Cor 7:15 musicworld.

If you do marry again marry a believer 2 Cor 6:14.

Raymond
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Old 4th March 2010, 01:27 PM   #5
musicworld
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Re: Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

Unless there has been a pre-nuptial agreement you should get a share of the house etc.

There was no Pre-nup and she stands to be the wealthier out of the two of us, I will seek professional advice on the matter, but in general what is the rule of thumb in this case? would I stand to gain anything from the divorce or is it only the women who stands to gain from a divorce?

Last edited by musicworld; 4th March 2010 at 09:17 PM.
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Old 4th March 2010, 01:36 PM   #6
Raymond
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Re: Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

Musicworld I have never been divorced but many have on here. You are better off without a pre nuptial agreement being in place though in your situation.

I would pose your question on the marriage help part of the forum. You should get some answers pretty quickly I think.

Raymond
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Old 4th March 2010, 03:23 PM   #7
musicworld
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Re: Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

If that is the case you can let her leave according to scripture.

I read the scripture and understand it, except when GOD says man is not bound in such circumstances. Is GOD saying that man can allow his unbelieving wife to leave and therefore is then clear for divorce? or only that the two can separate but must remain married?
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Old 4th March 2010, 06:39 PM   #8
Raymond
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Re: Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

Hi Musicworld. I take it to mean you are free to marry as it also says you are not under bondage in such cases. You are the innocent party in this remember.

Immorality is also grounds for divorce. How long will it take for that to happen.

I don't see any reason why you shouldn't remarry if you meet the right person, although it is better if you marry a christian so that you are travelling the same path.

Raymond
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Old 4th March 2010, 09:33 PM   #9
musicworld
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Re: Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

As far as I was aware the only part in scripture that says either one can divorce is with regard to marital unfaithfulness, or could I be wrong?
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Old 4th March 2010, 11:00 PM   #10
Raymond
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Re: Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

You are right. I called it immorality as some versions do. In life it is not so straight forward as I believe some states of porn addiction are also a mental adultery.

Also, as I mentioned, when an unbeliever departs let them.

Raymond
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Old 19th June 2010, 10:00 AM   #11
murrayskeeter
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Re: Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

I think this could be a possible grounds for divorce as it may lead to financial issues. Sooner or later every couple has to deal with money and lack of budget may be a result of no work. When there is not enough to go around, differences in temperament and priorities are brought to a head.

Last edited by murrayskeeter; 20th June 2010 at 01:52 PM.
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Old 4th July 2010, 03:56 AM   #12
chosen
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Re: Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

It seems incredible to me that she wants a divorce over something such as this which isnt your fault, and as she loves her work then what is the problem?She refuses to leave so that you can get work, so what does she expect?
If she insists on a divorce then you have no choice but if you have a house and any other assetts then you should claim half of the value.
To be honest I think you will be well rid of a woman like that, and as has bean said already never marry a non believer again.
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Old 4th March 2020, 11:08 AM   #13
NalaLyla
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Re: Wife Wants a Divorce Because Of No Work...

Quote:
Originally Posted by musicworld View Post
Hi

I decided to add this post to find out where I stand in the law of marriage, the story goes... I was made redundant some time ago due to the crisis and have been unemployed ever since (six months) I have seeked to find work in all areas but due to living on a tourist island (Tenerife) I've been extremely limited in finding a full time position. My wife works full time as a sales rep and receives a wealthy income each month due to high sales, so her supporting the both of us since my redundancy has not would you say crippled her account in any way.

However that is not the point, I being the man understand I'm obligated in a marriage to provide and support for my wife’s needs, but this has just not been possible due to where we live, and its come to the point where she can't bear the fact of me not working any more and bringing in an income.

I admit I completely agree with her attitude and as a result I'm feeling ashamed and terribly embarrassed about the whole thing that is why I've strongly suggested that we both move back to the UK where there is a greater opportunity for me to work, but she has rejected this offer due to her high position of work and saying that she’s happy where she is, but at the same time has threatened to kick me out and is considering divorce.

We’ve been married five years, to encapsulate our relationship would be to say where compatible, faithful, honest, and caring for each other, I myself don’t drink smoke or do drugs and there is no signs of physical abuse towards each other. but i being a christian just can't except the fact that she wants a divorce, So considering we are man & wife and the house is in her name could she stand any grounds in a court of law as apposed to having me evicted even though we are married?
My divorce story taught me with one truth: the more powerful and independent a wife is, the less her husband will earn. The more a woman will be occupied with the house and children, the more comfortable the family nest will be, the more the man will earn. This is how human instincts work. In what case can a husband’s low income be a reason for divorce? To me, there is only one thing: if a man categorically does not want to take on financial responsibility and maintaining a family, along with household chores and raising children. If a man earns not much, but is actively involved in household chores and spends a lot of time with children, this is another matter. Perhaps he just lacks professional confidence. My ex wanted to relax all the time and doesn’t seem having any opportunity to move on and grow professionally or in any other way. He wasn’t involved in relationship and I had to proceed to do it yourself divorce forms, because I supposed that we shall never get separated. Still, if you are looking for career opportunities and would like to do smth for your family, why not to try saving family or even may be family counselling?
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