bereavement
I'd agree with all that Kate has said, with an extra suggestion. If your bridesmaid's family are coming to the wedding, perhaps they can think of a special way that you could remember her. Talk to them, as it may help both them and yourself.
My own dad died about 4 months before I married, and of course we missed him, and my uncle mentioned him in the speech he gave (we were married in a registry office not a church, so prayers were not said). It's true that there is a gap when someone special has died, and as you stated, she wouldn't have wanted to spoil your day, but it's still important to remember her and to acknowledge the help she gave you.
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