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Old 29th November 2007, 02:21 PM   #1
Faith1
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Advice Needed Please!

Hello, I have met a wonderful muslim man who is 29 years of Age. I am a divorced Christian (catholic) woman with one child. We have only known each other to this day for about a week. The thing is we get along very well, however, i notice when we are out in public, he whispers, is conscious of who is around him. He has indicated that if i was to call his home and his mother was to answer, it would cause a great deal of friction and problems for him.
I have not heard from him for about 2 days, and I have not contacted him, because perhaps he is dealing with the dilemma of deciding whether to continue to see me or not. He said that if anyone in his community was to see him with me (a non-muslim) and it got back to his parents, it would cause GREAT tension and problems in his family..............
Any advice........is this something I should not pursue? I have come to the realization that if he does not contact me, then this is perhaps something that I should not pursue and leave it at that as he has apparently made a decision that his religious values are more important than our possibly pursuing dating etc.
Should I quit while I am ahead and before my emotional attachment to him grows?, and avoid any potential heartache? He is a wonderful man, very romantic, charming.......however it appears the religious aspect is a potential red flag.
Any advice would be appreciated.
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Old 1st December 2007, 05:41 PM   #2
Raymond
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Posts: 6,409
Re: Advice Needed Please!

The religious aspect is a red flag. See other posts.
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Old 2nd December 2007, 08:30 AM   #3
Shasha
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Posts: 29
Thumbs up Re: Advice Needed Please!

Hi there,
From reading a bit about the guy you met, it seems fitting to say that you should be careful with people of different faiths.
As the Bible says, darkness and light cannot agree, so this alone is a great big red light! Be careful.
If you so desire a partner of the Christian faith, why don't you try the many Christian dating websites (but also be careful).
Pray about everything, including finding the right mate for yourself.
I did that almost 10 years ago and found my soul mate.
Although my marriage is not 100%, I thank God for my husband.
Also, try mixing and going out to Christian functions, especially when there are things like, bus trips, picnics, sports, etc. There are a lot of Christian single men out there! God will lead you!
Pray and seek Him. He'll give you the desires of your heart!
God bless!
S. P.
__________________
"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son,
That whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life."

"For God did not send His son into the world to condemn the world,
But that the world through Him
might be saved." JN 3:16,17

Grace be with you all.
God bless!
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Old 2nd December 2007, 09:20 AM   #4
1aokgal
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Re: Advice Needed Please!

Faith1..

You have posted about this situation before. Seems you are completely fixated on this man and as he has withdrawn ..you seem in full pursuit or anxiety. That is way too much emoton for a one week friendship. He has also asked and said he does not want to get calls at the home. He is either married or is just plain NOT interested.

This is a Muslim man who has many prohibitions about mixing faiths. Read up on the many who got involved in the Muslim relationships and the results are very poor. He is not into introducing you and seems to be going in the opposite direction. This is like the thrill of the chase for you and you wil feel foolish to be the only one invested in the friendship.
I recall you are divorced with a young child. Think of the child and what you need to do to become stable financially and emotionally. The man is giving you clear body language he is not interested to pursue a friendship. Drop it.
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Old 2nd December 2007, 07:28 PM   #5
danielx
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Re: Advice Needed Please!

Faith,

1aokgal is right. For the two of you to pursue this relationship, that would mean that either you, or he, go against your religion. Very possibly both of you would - at very least there would have to be compromise. Neither of your religions is very tolerant, especially where the upbringing of children is concerned.

By his actions and by his own words he has indicated quite unambiguously that he is not prepared to go against his religion and culture - that means that any sacrifice would have to come from you, and you do not even know what that might be!

He has distanced himself from you, so accept it. If you do not, I fear you will have to accept something far worse.

Drop it!

DX
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Old 4th December 2007, 02:40 AM   #6
Faith1
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Re: Advice Needed Please!

Thank you all for your very sound advice.
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Old 4th December 2007, 11:11 AM   #7
Shasha
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 29
Smile Re: Advice Needed Please!

Hi Faith1:
It is always a pleasure helping when I can. You seem like a genuine person and you deserve something wonderful going on for you, in your life; so keep trusting the Lord and He will guide you and lead you to someone lovely.
He knows the desire of your heart; so just wait on Him and trust Him.
Please do not be too anxious.
Keep us updated with things!

Love yah in Christ.
S. P.
__________________
"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son,
That whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life."

"For God did not send His son into the world to condemn the world,
But that the world through Him
might be saved." JN 3:16,17

Grace be with you all.
God bless!
Shasha is offline   Reply With Quote
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