I just can't forget!
I have not visited the site for some time now but am still in need of some advice. I discovered just over two years ago that my husband of 38 years cheated on me while on a family visit abroad. The affair is long over and to this day he still doesn't know why he did it and why he risked everything for what has since amounted to mean nothing whatsoever. He was, and still is, deeply regretful and is now overall a much more loving and attentive partner. We decided to try and put it behind us and move on and generally speaking that is what we have done and life is pretty good. I had a year of counselling and accepted the fact that it did happen and I don't regret our decision to stay together. However my problem is that I just cannot seem to forget or forgive what he did to me and that as more time goes by and the more 'normal' life becomes, the harder it is for me to understand why it ever happened in the first place. Never a day goes by when I don't think about it in some way or another and I cannot seem to get it out of my head. He has been totally honest and open with me, we have discussed everything and I don't have a problem regarding trust etc. so why do I still feel like this?
There are times when I seriously think there is something wrong with me and I should be able to deal with it all much better that I am as I know deep down that things could be a whole lot worse. Can anyone out there relate to any of this and give me some advice and help.
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