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Old 12th September 2007, 05:24 PM   #1
Ginger God
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A blog of the past 2 years...

For anyone out there who is currently going through separation or sees it as an only option I thought I would offer an insight of what can happen in two years emotions wise.

Its two years tonight since my wifes current partners girlfriend turned up at my door to advise me of the bedroom olympics that had been going on. As this wasnt the first affair she had I basically left her 4 months later.
I thought that as soon as I left things would be ok because I would be away from all the things that were causing my angst..how wrong I could be.
The first couple of months were dire. She never admitted having an affair but three months after I left he moved in...doh or what.
She went on holiday summer 2006 with him but not her kids..summed her up I suppose. I went away with the kids which was fine and although I never asked them what was going on I always wanted to know. I would talk to anyone that was prepared to listen to what had gone on..cost me a couple of girlfriends I think.
There were then accusations that her new man was taking cocaine and steroids..he was living with my kids so that wasnt too funky..I had a National newspaper at my door wanting to run a story on him as he trains a prominent political figure..this set me back a couple of months.
Christmas was awful because I agreed that the kids could wake up on Christmas morning at their Mums. Dropping them off on Christmas Eve seeing his car outside my old house was a bloody killer. But hey they are with me this year!
Wasnt until after Xmas that things started to improve..heard that her new man had cheated on her already which was no surprise..the kids went on holiday with their Mum and him this summer but I knew when it didnt actually bother me that I knew I had cracked it.
The only thing that has happened recently was that my ex complains about being skint but last week a £30000.00 jeep turned up in her drive..but hey its only a car..and shes living with a cheat.
As far as my relationships with girls are concerned all I can say is that I have met lots of nice girls, havent even remotely been close to love yet..but Im having a ball. I sleep at night..I dont have to look over my shoulder wondering what she is doing...I have a smile on my face constantly..and I can do what I want when I want if I want and within reason with whom I want.
So all in all..nearly two years to really get over one the breakup of my family and the loss of my wife...but she was a cheat and a liar so she wasnt worth it. I have two fantastic happy kids that nobody can take away from me and I am just enjoying every minute with them as my Mum says..enjoy it..they are only on loan to you.
You hear the old saying it takes time..and it does.
I was in the gutter two years ago, I knew that I had to leave but I felt such an outcast and a failure. I thought I would never be happy again and that no girl would find me attractive..jings there are so many single people out there who just want to have a good time..and I am no Brad Pitt!!
Will I marry again..at this moment that has to be a no..I dont even think I am capable of living with someone again. Once you have slept alone all night in your bed for two years the thought of someone sharing it is really quite alien.
This board is to help folk like myself two years ago and I have regularly posted to help myself and also to help others and its quite important if you have no one else to talk to.
Im dating at the moment and its good fun..apparently shes not in love with me which is fantastic news..love just complicates things.
So tonight its childless as I have just had the kids for the past four nights...sit down with a cold beer and watch the magnificent Bravehearts of Scotland smash the World Cup runners up in Paris...well I am allowed to dream amnt I?
So if I can get through breakup anyone can because I always considered myself to be weak...but not anymore.......

Graham
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Old 12th September 2007, 06:08 PM   #2
Annie2
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Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

Graham,
I bloody love you!!!
Annie (who smiled for the first time today after reading that)
xx
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Old 13th September 2007, 08:32 AM   #3
Lauz
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Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

Well done Graham! I hope I can post in 2 years with a happy story from me...
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Old 13th September 2007, 05:37 PM   #4
Ginger God
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Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie2 View Post
Graham,
I bloody love you!!!
Annie (who smiled for the first time today after reading that)
xx

Annie...this bit about loving me..where are you again?
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Old 14th September 2007, 12:51 PM   #5
outoftheblue
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Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

I've always been very sceptical about websites/chatrooms and the like thinking they were for weirdos and nae'r (?) do wells. But since finding this site(by accident on Google) I realise not every internet user is a fake.

Reading the threads of so many people in various emotional states is wonderfully theraputic and supportive.

Graham is proof of this. Your latest posting isn't asking for help, it's offering help and comfort to others in need. Not sure if you are religious but still a truly Christian thing to do.

I have gained strength from everyone here and whilst everyone has hopes for different outcomes to their current problems just knowing (and caring) how the lives of others turn out really matters.

Despite the fact we are all anonymous, I feel quite close to some of you and find myself thinking of you during the day-how's Coffeebean's baby/Did AnnieP's operation go ok? And like I would ring a friend I come online to check everyone's doing and even worry about them if they've not been online for a while. Do I need to get out more????

Anyway thank you Graham and well done for getting through a tough time and coming out 'normal' (for a Scotsman) on the other side. And despite the fact you Scots hate us English, still well done for beating the Frogs on their own turf!!!

Cxx
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Old 14th September 2007, 02:28 PM   #6
AnnieP
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Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

Graham, you are a star!
Here's to two years time.....
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Old 14th September 2007, 04:16 PM   #7
Ginger God
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Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnieP View Post
Graham, you are a star!
Here's to two years time.....
Annie..I cant marry you yet..Im still married..until the 2nd November this year..then she gets an Exocet.....

Graham
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Old 14th September 2007, 04:22 PM   #8
Ginger God
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Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

Quote:
Originally Posted by outoftheblue View Post
I've always been very sceptical about websites/chatrooms and the like thinking they were for weirdos and nae'r (?) do wells. But since finding this site(by accident on Google) I realise not every internet user is a fake.

Reading the threads of so many people in various emotional states is wonderfully theraputic and supportive.

Graham is proof of this. Your latest posting isn't asking for help, it's offering help and comfort to others in need. Not sure if you are religious but still a truly Christian thing to do.

I have gained strength from everyone here and whilst everyone has hopes for different outcomes to their current problems just knowing (and caring) how the lives of others turn out really matters.

Despite the fact we are all anonymous, I feel quite close to some of you and find myself thinking of you during the day-how's Coffeebean's baby/Did AnnieP's operation go ok? And like I would ring a friend I come online to check everyone's doing and even worry about them if they've not been online for a while. Do I need to get out more????

Anyway thank you Graham and well done for getting through a tough time and coming out 'normal' (for a Scotsman) on the other side. And despite the fact you Scots hate us English, still well done for beating the Frogs on their own turf!!!

Cxx
C...I just wanted people to know that there is life after separation for whatever reason we split. And sorry I am not a religious person but it was a lovely thing to say.
And I know its horrible and its a really dark place..I wouldnt dress it up as anything else but its a holiday wekend in Edinburgh now and i have the kids a day early this weekend and my "girlfriend" is coming round tonight and the weeknd looks lovely.
And no we didnt beat the frogs...we taught them a football lesson that shows that the every dog has its day..and one day I will show my soon to be ex that she was foolish to cheat on her pedigree husband and hook up with a mongrel who will bring her nothing but heartbreak.
Anyway I must fly and make myself look good for my girl..jings I only have 4 hours to do it! How long does polyfilla take to set?

To infinity and beyond...

Graham
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Old 14th September 2007, 06:54 PM   #9
outoftheblue
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Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

Graham have a wonderful weekend with your kids and your friend who's a girl. You sound like a lovely man and your true pedigree shines through.

One day you'll be Top Dog again and the mongrel will **** his leg on the wrong lamp-post, but for now just enjoy running with the pack!

Cxx

Just one question "jings" is that a Scottish thing cos I know it doesn't relate to Buzz Lightyear?
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Old 14th September 2007, 10:49 PM   #10
Ginger God
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Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

Jings is really just a word for say flipping heck....as the Broons would say Jings Crivens Help Ma Boab....dont ask for a translation of that one.

G
x
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Old 21st September 2007, 10:50 AM   #11
michelle_b
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Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

Hi Graham,
I Don't come here often as it were
I Myself am at the point of seperation, I See it as the only way to go forward although it's breaking my heart just now.
Can i send you a BIG thank-you!
You have given me a lot of hope as i am so very very scared of moving on, (on my own,with my kids) I Know it's going to take a lot of time and i'm not really prepared for what it entails but things can't get any worse than they are right now.
Thank You again for giving ne some hope , your words have helped me a lot!
Michelle.
p.s. Didn't we do well against France?
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Old 21st September 2007, 11:15 AM   #12
Ginger God
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Posts: 322
Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

Quote:
Originally Posted by michelle_b View Post
Hi Graham,
I Don't come here often as it were
I Myself am at the point of seperation, I See it as the only way to go forward although it's breaking my heart just now.
Can i send you a BIG thank-you!
You have given me a lot of hope as i am so very very scared of moving on, (on my own,with my kids) I Know it's going to take a lot of time and i'm not really prepared for what it entails but things can't get any worse than they are right now.
Thank You again for giving ne some hope , your words have helped me a lot!
Michelle.
p.s. Didn't we do well against France?
Michelle...
No probs..if you want to talk you can get me at grahamburnett@yahoo.co.uk, I will help all I can..a lot of folk here helped me a couple of years ago..its my turn now.
Ask me anything I will do my best to support you.
Yes we did fantastically well..its now getting scary where we could end up.

Graham
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Old 21st September 2007, 12:20 PM   #13
michelle_b
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Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

Graham,
Thanks for that,i will take you up on the emails if you don't mind.
I Could really do with a "friendly face" just now,

Michelle.
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Old 21st September 2007, 04:21 PM   #14
Ginger God
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Re: A blog of the past 2 years...

Quote:
Originally Posted by michelle_b View Post
Graham,
Thanks for that,i will take you up on the emails if you don't mind.
I Could really do with a "friendly face" just now,

Michelle.
Dont know about the friendly face...its a bit gnarled now!!

Any time Michelle..moan all you want to me..you will get through it if you go ahead but its not easy.

Graham
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