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Old 23rd July 2010, 02:40 PM   #16
JWD
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Re: For me!

Sorry to hear that Jen. Don't beat yourself up for calling. You did so well getting as far as you could. You allow people to look after you now.

I will be thinking of you and sending you healing thoughts.

One day, you will be so much stronger and a different person for all that you are going through. I promise you that.

Love Jo xx
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“One day you’re going to wake up and realize how much you care about her and how amazing she really is… and when that day comes she’ll be waking up next to the man who already knew”
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Old 23rd July 2010, 04:08 PM   #17
Ageing Grace
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Re: For me!

Oh, Jen I'm so sorry.

Please don't blame yourself. You are worth a decent life, you know! For now, just pick one small, beautiful thing each day (you have your kids, so that shouldn't be too hard ) - isn't a little piece of beauty every day worth living for?

xxx
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Old 24th July 2010, 02:57 AM   #18
mdmquincy
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Re: For me!

I am back home. For what it's worth. Thank you for the kind thoughts. I continue to have a difficult time. My husband is unremorseful for his behavior. Blames it all on me. Says he is reading a book called "walking on eggshells." Guess I'll read that to see what I am being accused of this time, when I figure out exactly what book he is referring to me.

I am spending the night at a friend's house, because everyone is afraid to leave me alone. Probably not way off base. My brother called. They all found out what happened from M. No betrayal there, none whatsoever.

I love you.
J
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Old 24th July 2010, 04:29 PM   #19
dazed and confused
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Re: For me!

Hi Jen

As you know already I'm so worried about you. Nothing I say can change how you feel I have an idea were your head is at and I'm so scared for you. I know you feel beaten right now but your not.You do have the fight in you just dig deep it's in there.I don't know how to private message on here for your ph # but I'd call you if you ever need to talk anytime. I just don't want you to anything rash.


All My Love Val
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Old 25th July 2010, 05:20 PM   #20
mdmquincy
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Re: For me!

I had friends over for dinner last night, and I think something got through this time. I feel more resolved that M, as I knew him, is dead and gone. Gone. I hope that resolve lasts for a bit. I need the respite.

I had a weird reaction to my medicine in the middle of the night. Caused some delusions. I figured as long as I didn't' move, it's okay. I'll have to monitor for a couple of days, but I did just change meds again-- which some account to the earlier activities.

@Val-- Thank you for your concern. I feel like I am getting better at the moment. Don't worry. I am a facebooker, if you are interested. I'll link my name.

Jennifer
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Old 25th July 2010, 05:32 PM   #21
UpandDown
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Re: For me!

Hi Jennifer

Good to hear from you. I've been a bit out of action for 24 hours due to a bad reaction to the pain killing patch (although was pain free!)

Glad to hear you're feeling better. Will catch up with FB.

Love Kathryn
x
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Old 26th July 2010, 03:12 AM   #22
dazed and confused
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Re: For me!

Hi Jen

I'm on facebook also.I haven't been on there for along time I haven't changed my status to single yet and only afew on there have I told them of Dave and I.I just hate talking about it to them as I worked with most of them and they know I quit my job to work with Dave. I guess it's time to do it. I'm sure they all know "sigh" they like to talk.I'd link you mine but how do you do that??

Love Val
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Old 26th July 2010, 10:56 PM   #23
So alone
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Re: For me!

hey, mdm,
I am sending you all I have in smiles and support. I am glad to hear you're a little better too.
I think you're a truly brilliant, capable and lovely person and wish I lived around the corner.

x
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Old 28th July 2010, 01:54 PM   #24
dazed and confused
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Re: For me!

Hi Jen

Just wondering how your doing.I'm thinking of you and sending you my love.


Love and Hugs

Val
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Old 29th July 2010, 02:52 AM   #25
mdmquincy
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Lightbulb Re: For me!

Sorry, I started school this week, and I have been really busy. I have had a pretty good week, but I had a really tough appointment with my counselor today. I posted a couple of days ago, but it must have been sucked into the internet....
I thought I posted my facebook link, hoping it would work. http://www.facebook.com/lagrone should get you there. Anyone is welcome to add me, just let me know you are from the forum and what your posting name is.

Love and kisses and thinking of you all too. Will try to catch up this weekend.
J
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Old 29th July 2010, 05:35 AM   #26
dazed and confused
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Re: For me!

Hi Jen

I'm so glad your doing well.I so suck at the whole fb thing.I hope I sent my request to the right person?? If you get a request from a val that's me.It will be nice to get to know you better.

Take Care Val
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Old 30th July 2010, 09:11 PM   #27
mdmquincy
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Re: For me!

Quote:
Originally Posted by dazed and confused View Post
?? If you get a request from a val that's me.It will be nice to get to know you better.
Still haven't gotten a request. Try again. I'd like to have that opening for discussin, too.
J
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Old 31st July 2010, 02:44 AM   #28
dazed and confused
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Re: For me!

Hi Jen

Ok I tried again.I think I sent a request to a differant Jennifer.I told you I'm awful at f/b.If I fail I'll just give you my last name because val is my first name. Gee that made no sence ha ha.Hope everything is going well.

Love Val
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Old 26th August 2010, 06:11 PM   #29
mdmquincy
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Re: For me!

It's been a while with school starting and all, and I have not updated in a bit so I thought I'd stop for a minute and let everyone know where I am and what's going on.

Earlier this week, I got an order of protection from my husband. We go to court in early September. After the incident earlier this summer, H shows up at my door last Friday and refused to leave. I had to call the police to get him off the premises.

I have hired an attorney, but we are waiting for my husband to file for divorce first as that means he will be responsible for paying the court costs.

I have good and bad days still. My bad days are less though. I still want him to wake up, call, and tell me that he has been ill. He doesn't seem to understand what he is losing, but I can't keep letting him run me to the ground. Not for me, but for my girls. They are becoming an absolute wreck. It took all my stamina to file for the order, but I knew I did the right thing when my 16 yo said that she was so relieved to not have to deal with the anger that has become my husband.

My meds seem to be working better. I find myself in pre-chuckle state quite often, but I can easily slip to contemplative and overanalytical states, as well. I've got lots of work to do.

I still don't want to be divorced, and I will fight in the hopes that treatment becomes a necessity for him. This thing is not what I married. I miss that person, and I truly believe he will return. Won't shake that one, it seems.

I hope everyone else is doing well, and I wish the best of luck to the newer batches. I intend on checking in with others if I can ever heal properly.

Love you all and I remember you daily.
Jennifer
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Old 26th August 2010, 06:56 PM   #30
Wiggle
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Thumbs down Re: For me!

Jen!

Good to hear from you, I was worried about you. You sound a little steadier, I'm really glad to hear that. How's school going?

I've been reading Getting Past Your Breakup: How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You by Susan Elliott. I like the fact it doesn't rule out a reconciliation (yeah, living in hope at this end too) but shows practical ways of having a long, hard look at what's going on in your life and relationships and ways of dealing with it. She mentions abandonment theory and grief therapy, boundaries etc. and talks you through life and relationship inventories. She pulls together a whole raft of ideas and concepts and applies them directly to our situation.

I've got next weeks off on holiday, staying with my sisters so won't be around much. But please keep us updated.

Huge hugs,

Axx
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