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Old 26th January 2015, 02:10 PM   #1
Dave
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Join Date: May 2001
Posts: 1,388
#mwsomethingspecial

I gave a talk yesterday, and in part of my preamble I spoke about our wedding day - about the arrival of my bride. ‘As I stood with my best man at the front of the church I was suddenly aware of a stirring in the congregation. The organ burst into full life with the clarion trumpet call that opens Purcell’s Trumpet Voluntary – my heart leapt within my chest, and I turned to see my radiant bride dressed more beautifully than I could ever have imagined coming down the aisle to stand at my side. Our eyes met, my heart stood still…. This was it – a moment of transformation in both our lives – two were about to become one! Much of the rest of the day is something of a blur now, but the joy of those moments lives with me still.’

Hardly a great eulogy to Liz, or a declaration of undying love, but simply sharing a precious memory. What surprised me, indeed what still amazes me is the reactions of several ladies who came up to me afterwards and expressed the wish that their husbands had been there to hear me speak in such terms of Liz. One lady just said to me “I don’t think my husband would ever say something like that of me”, and my heart wept for her.

It reminded me of the time (nearly 30 years ago) when I made a conscious decision to break with the typical male banter in the office which generally involved idolising some female celebrity (or secretary!), and running down one’s spouse/partner. I decided to start referring to Liz as “the best wife in the world!”

Now it’s certainly true that I got a fair bit of ribbing for my remarks, but slowly my colleagues learned that I actually meant it, and the whole level of criticism of wives and girlfriends gradually fell – I think it opened people’s eyes to the fact that their partners were important, and that blatant public disrespect probably wasn’t a great thing!

Of course, speaking like that of Liz also brought a level or peer, or even public, accountability. I could hardly admit to forgetting an anniversary or birthday etc – indeed I needed to make sure I properly reflected Liz’s value not only in my words, but also in my actions. No, I didn’t (and still don’t) get it all right, but honouring her in words and deeds has gradually become a value I continually aspire to.

So, here’s a suggestion. In just under two week’s time it will be Marriage Week. How would it be if we encouraged married couples everywhere to share through social media one special thing about their spouse each day! That’s just seven special things that you are proud to say publicly about the one special person in your life – hardly excessive!

For those who tweet can we suggest the hashtag #mwsomethingspecial – hopefully someone will set that up as we don’t tweet!

I’m going to start today on Facebook which means I’ll have to think of twenty things (not a problem!) so that hopefully we’ll build up a bit of momentum ahead of Marriage Week itself.

Perhaps we can just help even one lady so that she can no longer say “I don’t think my husband would ever say something like that of me” – and demonstrate in one very practical way how marriage embodies honour, respect and can bring deep happiness.
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Old 27th January 2015, 09:10 PM   #2
chosen
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Join Date: Aug 2009
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Re: #mwsomethingspecial

What we say about our spouse is so important. We can make or break our marriage with words and attitudes. I refuse to ever run down my husband in front of others, and I hate it when people do that. I also try and remember to tell him how amazing he is. His ex wife complained about him a lot, both to him and to others, and she was never content with him. It ended badly and he now has a wife who appreciates the very many wonderful qualities that he has.
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Old 28th January 2015, 09:47 AM   #3
Raymond
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Re: #mwsomethingspecial

All good stuff Dave. I think everybody at work knows how I love my wife and how faithful I am but there is room for improvement in using verbal compliments. I would love to grow in this.

One doesn't want to rub it in of course when someone is facing betrayal and unfaithfulness etc.
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Old 28th January 2015, 06:23 PM   #4
Dave
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Re: #mwsomethingspecial

Thanks for the good words guys.

All you have to do is to post on FB or tweet one positive quality each day with #mwsomethingspecial attached - let's get this rolling!
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Old 11th April 2015, 02:09 PM   #5
chosen
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Re: #mwsomethingspecial

When you are pregnant you dont loose much hair, and when you have had the baby more hair than usual comes out. Its normal so dont worry, it will right it self in time.
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Old 16th April 2015, 10:21 AM   #6
Raymond
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Re: #mwsomethingspecial

See the next thread down mikalwanted about that very thing.
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