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Old 4th July 2014, 08:44 PM   #16
chosen
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 5,794
Re: Am i sinning and how do i stop?

Quote:
Originally Posted by 1aokgal View Post
Dear GELM,

You and I have kinship in dealing with a problem that is much more prevalent in our world than most know. If anger is part of your day on a regular basis, than being a victim can become a habit that is hard to break. I choose to find positive ways to keep myself happy and productive and part of that expression is through creative artworks in the things I do.

You may need to speak to a counselor on a regular basis to as not to bottle up emotions. You need to decide how you will handle life, if there are no changes, and the best that can happen is what already exists. I love my husband with passion and unconditionally. That is a right decision for me. He is a kind, generous man who does a lot for me in every way he can. It is no understatement to say I think God approves of my respect and blesses me in this marriage.
What you tell yourself on daily basis will be fact. If you tell yourself you are unhappy and depressed, for sure you will be miserable.

Your love story is never finished until you choose to end it.
BTW..I would never expose my husband to the humiliation to be "talked at" over this problem by members of a church!

These emotional dysfunctions come from deep psychological wounds or problems. Private counseling by a licensed doctor of Psychiatry is no sure cure for such trauma that can cause a person to "shut down" and "shut off" from others! If porn use is involved, that is as addictive as any drug injected or imbibed for some. If life is better for you alone, than divorce is an option.
If you are a Christian, having an accountability partner is not being 'talked at', its having friends who can challenge each other, pray for each other and support each other. Withholding sex is just as bad as any other sexual sin and can destroy a marriage just as any other sexual sin can. Even if it doesnt end, its only half a marriage with one spouse being so selfish as to not even bother to try and get help for what they are doing to their partner.
It sometimes takes being challenged by someone outside the marriage for the person to actually act and begin to seek help to sort their issues out. If we are part of a church family, then gently challenging someone for their sin is perfectly Biblical. God tells us not to withhold sex.
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