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Old 4th January 2011, 08:57 AM   #1
georgie
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 424
I deleted my old thread my security blanket!

Hello all
I used to have rather a long thread on here - it started in March 2009. For a long time it was my security blanket/emotional anchor.
I separated on 14.2.09 and mercifully found this site about 2 weeks later. I went through ups and downs and at times updating this thread was the only calming thing I could do. I met wonderful people, made wonderful friends from all over the world and day by day, week by week I began to recover and feel better.
Today I feel happy and back in control of my life - 2 years ago I would never have believed it possible.
I deleted my thread today. It was quite a frightening thing to do because I had been so dependant on it for so long. However, I deleted it and was amazed to find it felt liberating as if I had officially graduated and moved on.

I'm putting together a blog to help people going through the same thing.
If you are interested it's:

http://gemwip.wordpress.com/

I hope it will be helpful.

Good luck everyone, keep talking and sharing, it really does help. xxx
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Old 21st January 2011, 12:04 PM   #2
georgie
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Re: I deleted my old thread my security blanket!

Hi
I've now created the following site - it has some emotional and practical advice.

http://www.restartyourlife.info/

I hope it helps in some way.
xxx
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Old 25th January 2011, 06:23 AM   #3
j92cool
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Posts: 183
Re: I deleted my old thread my security blanket!

Dear Georgie

I have not visited this site for ages but for some reason felt compelled to today, My journey in this site also started march 2009. I was fortunate enough to find this site on the very day my ex shot through. I too have come such a long way. I also never imagined I would be as happy as I am now. I still get lonely from time to time but would never in a million years go back. How great of you to offer support to others. It really does get better.


Cheers

Janine
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Old 26th January 2011, 04:37 AM   #4
georgie
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Posts: 424
Re: I deleted my old thread my security blanket!

I'm so delighted for you Janine. Who would have thought it a couple of years ago, we were both in the wars and could see no way out. You'll be happier now than you ever believed possible and its all down to your hard work, you have so much to be proud of Janine you're a phenomenal woman xxx
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Old 26th January 2011, 10:10 AM   #5
chosen
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Re: I deleted my old thread my security blanket!

Janine and Georgie
Good for you both. As you know, there is light at the end of the tunnel, and there is life after divorce. For me it was about 6 years when I met my second husband that I realised that, and I have never looked back. Both my husband and I, both betrayed by our ex spouses,are so happy and enjoying our second chance. We may both be in our early 50's, but life has never been better!
God Bless you both.
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Old 5th February 2011, 06:50 AM   #6
georgie
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Re: I deleted my old thread my security blanket!

Thanks so much Chosen, I'm so glad you found happiness again. It's more than possible whether single or repartnered. I'm in the dating stage now, and enjoying that. Strange at first, but interesting and flattering to meet new people and remember what it's like for someone to enjoy my company and visa versa.
It's impossible to believe that relief from the pain will ever come when one first resorts to these threads, but it does. It takes time and work. Ultimately with effort, one finds oneself again and realises that we're enough, and we deserve to be loved freely by ourselves as well as others.
x
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Old 5th February 2011, 02:53 PM   #7
georgie
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Re: I deleted my old thread my security blanket!

Hello again,
For those that may be interested I've created a Facebook Fan Page for anyone that would like to follow posts on how to survive Divorce, raise kids on your own and ultimately move on.
In Facebook if you search for Restart your life - it has a Lotus blossom as its profile picture (the symbol of survival).
Hope all are doing a little better every day xxx
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Old 11th February 2011, 12:00 AM   #8
Kimberley1967
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Re: I deleted my old thread my security blanket!

what is your face book fan page called?

I had a thread on here called Betrayal I started it around Feb 2006 and I cant bear to read it now. My name then on here was Kimberley but there was a technical blip and I had to change my user name to Kimberley 1967. I havent reread it so so painful at the time and it really helped having made new friends on here felt like I was unburdened as others were going through the same thing as me. When adultery hits you it hits like a thunderbolt and talking to others in the same boat helped so much.

Kim
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Old 11th February 2011, 09:58 AM   #9
georgie
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Re: I deleted my old thread my security blanket!

Hi Kim,
The web page is http://www.restartyourlife.info and on facebook its Restart Your Life with a 'you can do it' world war 2 poster as the profile pic.
Betrayal is a devastating thing, society is so flippant about affairs but the destruction that they cause is unfathomable. The loss of confidence in oneself that one suffers as a result, I dont just mean in terms of whether or not we feel attractive, it's a loss in confidence in our ability to judge anyone or any situation, or to maintain a relationship and build trust again. It can take years of hard work to overcome the damage.
There are so many reasons and justifications given, none are valid.

My webpage is designed primarily to assist people with rebuilding their lives. I'm hoping it will evolve over time and that people will find usefull information and some empathy, comfort and humour.
I hope you're doing well in your recovery Kim. I hope you are focused on you and your future now and not on your partner and their betrayal. Letting go of the anger is liberating. Living your life to the full and being happy is so much more powerful than revenge.
xxx
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Old 17th March 2011, 02:48 PM   #10
georgie
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Posts: 424
Re: I deleted my old thread my security blanket!

Hi Guys,

Some of you may find this book I came across today interesting - it may be of assistance in understanding the dynamics of some relationships

http://www.restartyourlife.info/?p=512

Hope it helps.
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