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Old 3rd January 2010, 11:33 AM   #1
yogamad
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New start

Happy New Year everyone.

I've started yet another thread in my 'journey'. As it's a new year, thought it seemed fitting. I've had a good Christmas, a few ups and downs along the way. H has got on my nerves a couple of times and I'm sure I've got on his but we got through the festive period without seriously falling out so that's good.

I'm sort of looking forward to going back to work next week as I have a slight case of cabin fever setting in but all in all feeling quite good.

Yoga
x
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Old 3rd January 2010, 03:09 PM   #2
georgie
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Join Date: Mar 2009
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Re: New start

Belated Happy Christmas & New Year YM. 2010 is the year we all decide to make the most of our lives and have fun in the process ... that's my wish for all on here xxx
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Old 4th January 2010, 11:10 AM   #3
yogamad
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Re: New start

Yeah, me too, Georgie. Wishing you and everyone all the best for 2010
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Old 4th January 2010, 04:41 PM   #4
jellybean28
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Re: New start

Me to everyone,

Here's to 2010 being a great year for all of us and the start of a new decade of wonderful new beginnings and expieriances (spelling sorry)


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Old 21st January 2010, 10:30 AM   #5
yogamad
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Re: New start

Good news!! H has got a johb!! It's abit of a commute for him but he seems ok about it and starts on 1st Feb. These last four months he's been at home have seemed like a long time. He's better in himself too, although he still says he's taking each day at a time. We're going out for a meal to celebrate at the weekend.

We've started our dance classes together and we're both really enjoying it, it's great fun. The classes are quite late, 9-10 pm so I hope he still feels like going after a long day at work.

It will be good to have the house to myself again in the mornings before I start work and hopefully my kitchen will be put right again as I still have no table!!!!!!!!

Apart from a few bickerings, we're getting on very well. I'll have to see if anything changes once he starts work again. I'll keep you posted.

xx
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Old 21st January 2010, 11:36 AM   #6
RayCub
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Re: New start

Ho Yoga, I'm so happy for you! You sound like you're really enjoying your life, and you deserve to!

Yay on hubby's job! That ought to take pressure off and add to his feelings of security which can only be a great thing for your relationship!

And dancing??? Oh my God, that sounds like so much fun!! What a great idea for you guys to spend close, quality time together

I'm SO happy for you! It's been a great New Year so far, huh??

Cheers!!
RC
XO
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Old 21st January 2010, 11:38 AM   #7
Wedgewood
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Join Date: Oct 2009
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Re: New start

Well done Yoga,

You are an inspiration to many of us here. I hope things continue on the up for you and congratulations to your H for his new job.

Mark x
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Old 21st January 2010, 02:06 PM   #8
jellybean28
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Re: New start

Good to hear about your husbands new job and that things are going well for you Yogamad.

Like Mark says your inspiration. Thanks for keeping us updated.

JB
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Old 22nd January 2010, 09:32 PM   #9
JWD
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Posts: 1,178
Re: New start

Hi Yoga, fab to see you are enjoying life. And great re hubbys job.

Look forward to catching up xx
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“One day you’re going to wake up and realize how much you care about her and how amazing she really is… and when that day comes she’ll be waking up next to the man who already knew”
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Old 24th January 2010, 02:40 PM   #10
yogamad
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Re: New start

Well, I spoke to soon about things going well. We haven't argued as such, we just aren't speaking at the moment.

Now H has got a job lined up, he's started picking on mine again, saying I don't do enough hours, how the house is all paid for because he worked so hard in the past, blah blah blah.

He's fed up with cooking and emptying the dishwasher, etc, etc. I know it's mundane doing housework but I've encouraged him to do other things outside the house. He thinks I should do the cooking now and then but I think he should because he's not working. Whilst I'm at work he's got all the time in the world to go on the computer, watch TV, etc so I don't think it's too much to ask of him. Once he starts work next week, I'll take over all the cooking and cleaning again because I'll be doing less hours than him but the fact is that he's not working at the moment.

Just when you think you're doing well, you take one step forward and three back.
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Old 24th January 2010, 03:30 PM   #11
jellybean28
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Re: New start

Oh dear Yoga,

Maybe your husband is worried about starting the new job and coping with it, so he's decided to have a rest before he starts working again, which is a bit unfair on you. His jibe about your work was harsh.

I agree he should be pulling his weight with the house work and cooking while you're working. Having it done for when you get home gives you both time to catch up with each other.

Hope things get better for you again Yoga, you are doing such a great job working at your marriage

Hugz JB
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Old 31st January 2010, 03:09 PM   #12
yogamad
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Re: New start

Hi Jellybean, yeah I think H is worrying about his new job so I'll be glad when he gets his first day (tomorrow) over and done with.

He's definitely had a rest this week, he's done absolutely nothing. I've had a horrible cold, worked overtime, been on a hard two day course and still had to come home to a mess. I actually didn't cook one night because by the time it took me to tidy up/pack away, etc it had gone 9 pm and I wasn't going to start cooking then. It kind of backfired though because he bought a takeaway with my money. I've only done the the ironing if I really had to, otherwise it's just been packed away. He took out a pair jeans and couldn't believe they weren't ironed.

Our "honeymoon" period is definitely over, we're sort of back to bickering, not making enough time for each other, etc, etc. The sex has dropped off too (more down to him than me). I always knew we'd have to work at our marriage, it just doesn't come easily to either of us. Having said that, we're still getting on better than we have done for years.

I think it'll be easier once he's working, I'll have my mornings back to myself again and will able to get all housework done before I go to work. I won't resent him not doing anything to help because he'll have been at work all day. So hopefully now we're not going to be in each other's pockets 24/7 we'll be able to get on better. Also, more money of course!

Monday nights are good because we both enjoy our dance class and have a good giggle together.

He's still making comments about my job not being good enough, it's not the job he said but the fact I only work 28 hrs a week. I find it really unfair when I've supported him through 4 months of unemployment.

One good thing is that I definitely stick up for myself now and will never be the doormat that I was a year ago.

I feel abit low today but I think that's because I've got a cold and not feeling 100% so I'll soldier on.

Hey, who knows, I might get my kitchen sorted out at last.
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Old 31st January 2010, 04:38 PM   #13
Ageing Grace
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Re: New start

Ho, hum, Yoga He's hard work, isn't he??!

Great news about his job! My guess is he's bigging himself up at your expense; his job's better than your job, blah blah. Very childish & annoying - hope you're coping OK with your 'Adult' hat on (plus deep breaths & an extra glass of wine!)

Best wishes for tomorrow and the rest of this week Have treats!

Love, AG
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Old 1st February 2010, 11:52 PM   #14
yogamad
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Re: New start

You're not kidding AG, he's VERY hard work but I find it alot easier than I used to. He'd love me to work full time and I think, no I know, that he'll put my job down again because he's that sort of bloke. But now I've learnt how to put him in his place, life's alot easier all round. Compared to this time last year, life's great!!!!!!

H had a good first day at work and is feeling positive. I had a lovely morning at home ON MY OWN and I got so much done. Went to work feeling on top of things for the first time in ages.

We went to our dance class tonight and as usual had a really good time and both came home in a good mood.

Hope things are good with you AG.

Love Yoga
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Old 2nd February 2010, 07:11 PM   #15
Raymond
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Re: New start

You are doing great Yoga. How you've moved on.

I'm glad that you are making a stand and not doing an extra job. You have enough on your plate. My wife has only worked about six hours a week for the last fifteen years. I'm not intending to pressure her. The atmosphere is beautiful when I come home. You have learned some lessons which you are putting into practice.

It's great about the dancing. I think you both really need that.

Sad about some of his words, but we all have negative traits. Try and see the good and encourage it as you have been doing. Usually when someone is negative an opportunity comes to speak a word of wisdom at some point, usually not at the time they are being negative, often much later.

Raymond
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