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Old 22nd February 2016, 09:57 PM   #1
Davd2208
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Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 1
texts

me and my wife went on a short break to Guernsey I wasn't met to be going but due to some unforeseen circumstances I ended up going last minute the idea was for my wife to see my sister and meet up with a male Dr friend and get met sister to help him out around the island, anyway when we got there i had no wifi so to contact home I used the wife phone and came across a message from a few days earlier from the Male Drit said. where are you my wife replied only land on Saturday he replied oh I had Viagra and I thought you was gonna sex me up, I show the wife that I had seen it and she said that he talks like that to everyone. I wasn't happy so i text him off the wife phone saying that I wasn't happy. me an the wife got through that 2 weeks later i looked on her phone again I don't make a habit of this but this is what the wife had text the Male Dr

It was a difficult time for me in Guernsey! The first couple of days were horrendous!! Dave was looking through my fone! He got all paranoid, he does not understand our friendship at all!! However, we managed to talk loads of things through & faced a lot of demons! Things have been much better since. So I want to apologise to you for the weirdness! & also thank you, it was all part of the journey I believe. Who knows what the future holds. You were right last night, we do have to trudge through masses of **** before we get to a better place, I firmly believe that I am undergoing a massive transformation. Everything will turn out the way it is meant to be. For now I am leaving things firmly in the hands of the Angels and the universe! I will get there too!! Look after yourself and make a difference.
i asked the wife why she had apologised when really he should of an i thought she wouldn't of contacted him again it just seems to me that she's more on his side than mine as if i was in the wrong to text him to say i wasn't happy
can some one tell me I'm being paranoid over nothing
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Old 24th February 2016, 08:10 PM   #2
Lindentree1
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Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 1,253
Re: texts

Hi,

You might get your post seen by more people if you put this in the Marriage Help forum under Advice.

I would have been upset by that Viagra text. It seems like an inappropriate joke to a married woman. I think you and your wife need to talk things out. You need to feel like she's on your side. At the very least ask her not to speak to this man about you again.

Some trust needs to be established because you don't want to spend the rest of your marriage looking at her phone, nor would I imagine she is comfortable with you doing so.

Hopefully you can talk this out and establish trust again.
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Old 24th February 2016, 09:10 PM   #3
chosen
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 5,794
Re: texts

Its a very inappropriate text for anyone to send or receive from a person of the opposite sex they arent married or or in a relationship with. I do wonder how she would feel if you texted other women like that. In your place I would be very upset. To be honest she needs to cut off contact with him but I doubt she will do that.
You need to talk about it and set some boundaries with the opposite sex.
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Old 25th February 2016, 10:41 AM   #4
Raymond
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,409
Re: texts

I agree. What is wrong is that she is apologising to him for your behaviour and the weirdness. The Dr is the weird one if anyone and your wife should not be enabling this. As mentioned the words are very inapropriate to send to a married woman. One seriously wonders what would have happened between them if you hadn't gone. I'd really watch anything to do with him. To me it is an unhealthy relationship. He has certainly made a play for her and she is putting up with his dirty talk as if it is nothing.
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