Need to move on

Hello folks,

Been a long time since I've been on this site, years in fact but suppose I always knew I would be back at one point. I'm separated now, since last October when I left the 20 year marriage that once was my life. It's been a hard time for me. I rent a flat on my own, money is tight and I'm lonely but it's where I need to be in my life just now - no more lonely than I was at home, we lived separate lives in the end. I practically lived in the bedroom and concentrated on my job, he would sit at TV with his mobile, tablet & laptop moving from one device to another every night. His drinking was a problem, he will never admit that. Recently diagnosed with diabetes he still* continues to live the lifestyle of a 20 something guy with not a care in the world. It was hard to watch. His health deteriorating in front of my eyes.

Anyway, just a snippet of where I'm at, day at a* time, good & bad days. I still think it's baffling how you think you know someone after twenty odd years. I know there's people out there like me but I still feel that my situation is different, for lots of reasons. Although I loved him, I never felt truly married - he made it that way and he still can't see it.

Any comments, stories, thoughts are welcome. I'm in need of some comfort that I'm not alone and will get through this.

Nice to hear from anyone out there.

Star x