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   Home  > Health Club > Building closeness and intimacy > Articles

Keeping Your Relationship Fresh

By David & Maureen Brown

Some ideas to try

  • When your children are little and in bed (and may be you can’t get a babysitter) just occasionally use the time to create a special ‘dinner date’. Cook a favourite meal or a favourite take-away and lay up the table with flowers, candles and may be some wine. It needn’t be expensive but the effect can be very worthwhile.
  • Leave each other notes. Leave them where you know they will find them. For example the wife of a friend of ours puts notes in her husband’s suitcases when he goes away on business trips, in his pyjama pocket, slippers or his wash bag or something like that. It can mean a lot. Particularly when he is away and feeling a bit lonely finding one of these it is well worthwhile.
  • Ask friends or family to look after the children, even if it is only for an hour or so and go for a walk, go to the shops without children tugging at you. Take yourselves off somewhere together. Just do something simply for yourselves. Take it in turns to choose what you do together.
  • As the children get older you can go away for a night. It needn’t be expensive; bed and breakfast can offer value for money. If there are no children it is easy to fill in your time with other things. Make the effort to go that extra mile and take time to be together.
  • Take time in your appearance and dress up, even for a ‘special’ meal on your own at home.
  • Ladies, buy yourself some nice underwear, a nightdress or perfume etc. to make yourself special and feel romantic.
  • Surprise each other occasionally, does not have to be big things, even small things, a bunch of flowers or preparing a meal for her – and then doing the dishes afterwards. It can all add to a surprise, being different and creative. Don’t let romance die, keep it alive. Don’t leave it until St. Valentine’s Day!
  • May be a blast from the past, your song, and one that you used to know when you were younger. Something you used to do together, your favourite foods etc.
  • All this can be difficult in our busy lives with a family but we, as a couple have to put ourselves on the priority list, yes even be a little bit selfish. A little romance can bring back some sparkle and excitement into any relationship.

To sum up ‘Love Is’ - love is forgiving, forgetting, releasing, equipping, and strengthening the one you love. It costs to love - love is never free.


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Copyright David & Maureen Brown


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