Keeping the romantic spark in a long-term relationship
By Ms HeartBeat - Relationship Advice Columnist
Weíve been married for 12 years, busily raising our three daughters. Lately I feel the need for romance, atmosphere and sensuality in my marriage. My dear husband has never been very romantic, and it was okay beforeÖ. I guess I was just so busy with the babies. Now that the kids are growing up, I find I want more than the sex thing from my husband. Thereís no problem with the act itself, but all the mental and emotional lovemaking that precedes the act just isnít there. I feel romantically deprived and I yearn for romance! I just donít know how to create it or how to entice my husband. All the focus has been on the children and raising our family. What do you suggest?
First thing is donít think of waiting for HIM to do it! Take that bull by the horns, girlfriend. Tell him what you want, what you feel your marriage needs, then go about setting things up so that you can get what you want from your man. Organize a romantic rendezvous, complete with new lingerie at a bed and breakfast inn. Get him some little sexy something too! Set up a romantic weekend just for the two of you. Get one with a big bathtub big enough for two! Get champagne and some nice CDís. Talk to him; tell him how much you have missed him. Tell him how much you love him, and are happy he is there with you. Go all out! This is your HUSBAND, not some chump you just met. He will follow your lead and with time, learn how to give you the romance you need. Women teach men how to be romanticÖnot ONE is born knowing how! Make it fun and exciting, and remember to always thank him, no matter how small and seemingly insignificant his efforts may be at adopting romantic behavior. He will like pleasing you and feeling good when he sees that he has the power to make you blissfully happy. He will want to and will continue to do it more and more. Work it girlfriend!