The cycle of a relationship
All marriages go through cycles which can repeat themselves over and over again. They usually start with the romantic stage where the partnership is seen as perfect. We carefully avoid looking at each others faults and we are intent on convincing ourselves that all is well. At some point reality hits and we begin to notice little things that niggle or irritate.
Usually at this point we become convinced that our partner needs to change. We try to sort the problems out or to change their behaviour. Not surprisingly we can encounter resistance or even animosity.
For some couples this just causes them to withdraw from each other. They can’t find away through so they get on with their lives picking up the attitudes and behaviours they had when they were single. The way forward is to recognise that they are in the relationship together and for the longer term. Where possible they can sit down and talk about the problem and find a way to move forward and so the cycle begins again. Crucial to that stage of working through the problem is being willing to accept that neither of them are perfect, but they are willing to go on loving each other just he way they are. Healthy change usually comes because someone wants to change themselves. So if you find yourselves at any of these stages, don’t despair –see what you can do to move to the stage where your relationship is renewed – that’s the way to experience deep joy and contentment in your relationship.
Tip by Liz Percival