Jealousy is one of the hardest things
many relationships have to deal with. Even when it
doesn't appear openly, either partner may find themselves
struggling to avoid setting off jealousy in the other.
Is jealousy an emotion based on love,
or is it a feeling that's triggered more by my fears of not
being loved? If it's the latter, maybe it's time to ask
myself what I'm really afraid of and why.
Maybe I'm basing part of my
relationship on how attractive I am, what I can do for my
partner, or how good I "make" them feel. If I
am, I'll always be in danger of having my them find someone
who is more attractive, or gives them more than I can. Do
I really want such a cloud hanging over my head?
If I remember that genuine love
involves sharing who I am, not how good I
am, I can start seeing what kinds of things I'm doing in
my relationship that keep me feeling inadequate. Love is
acceptance, not a popularity contest.
Just for Today
Today, if I feel myself getting jealous
over a choice my loved one makes, I'll stop and ask myself
"why"? In finding the reasons, I'll discover
things in my relationship that I've been basing on things
other than love and true acceptance.
I'll talk over my feelings with my partner
or a trusted friend, and see if I can discover new ways
of looking at our relationship that add more love and
Jealousy it's the art of injuring ourselves more than
others. - Alexandre Dumas
Tip by Bernd Hansen of Relationshipweb